Life is so hard because life is so easy.
I could end the article there, but you probably want more of an explanation than that.
We have everything we could ever want.
We also have the power to choose to indulge in these things whenever we want.
And that, my friends, is a dangerous combination for the underdeveloped human mind.
This combination of having whatever we want whenever we want it, coupled with our ever-dwindling attention spans, is making life far less enjoyable to live.
The paradox of choice is real, and it’s awfully painful.
The good news — we have the ability to reduce these choices and force scarcity upon ourselves.
The bad news — doing that is really bloody hard.
Let me tell you how I try, fail, but sometimes actually succeed in doing it.
You’ve Got To Fight The Power
If the paradox of choice was a super villain, then scarcity, boredom and imperfection would be the dudes trying to stop him.
It’d be a pretty crappy movie though, and a rare one in which the bad guy would most likely come out on top.
See, choice is so difficult these days because we’re choosing more than just the thing, we’re choosing a future feeling instead.
This is what separates us from the animals (except the weasel).
Let’s start materialistically.
When you buy a pair of shoes, you’re not actually thinking about the shoes themselves, you’re thinking about how others are going to perceive you in certain situations when you’re wearing them.
And yeah, you better believe that’s gonna’ make you think twice.
Our little human brains aren’t designed to deal with all these choices.
We evolved in environments where choices were limited.
Food, shelter and survival were the only concerns we had — and having only these few things to worry about made decision-making efficient and necessary for survival.
So it’s not that we struggle to pick a pair of shoes we like… it’s that we struggle to pick the shoes we like best.
There is a huge difference between the two, and this is where the paradox comes into play.
We’re Too Dumb To Choose The Right Thing
“Anticipation is sometimes more exciting than the thing itself.”
Gayle Forman
You don’t scroll on the Netflix home page for 10 minutes because ‘there’s nothing to watch.’
You scroll because you don’t want to choose the wrong thing.
If the show you choose starts off slow and pretty boring for the first 5 minutes, you’re going to have the urge to go back and find something else.
We crave perfection, and in a world where there’s so much to choose from, we have convinced ourselves that perfection must surely exist.
So choice, in the 21st century, extends far beyond what’s necessary for our survival, and even further beyond what we simply ‘like’.
Choice is now a futile chase for perfection (sounds intense, but I think it’s true).
And the more options there are in any one choice, the harder said choice is to make.
Exhausting, man.
I’m even exhausted writing this damn thing.
So.
Much.
Stuff.
Everywhere.
There are a couple solutions to this.
The first is that you convince yourself that choosing the wrong thing doesn’t actually matter.
And you know what, it really bloody doesn’t.
But even when you know this, you’re going to find it difficult to do.
‘What if’ is a powerful set of words, and you’ll have to meditate on them quite a bit if you want to remove them from your vocabulary.
The second, almost as difficult but slightly less-so option, is to force scarcity upon yourself.
And this is what I’ve been trying to do.
The Power of Forced Scarcity
I was so sick of my music the other day that I actually turned it off and put the radio on.
But not just the radio… AM radio.
Two dudes just absolutely riffin’ off each other, chatting about things that I didn’t think were politically correct these days, and having a grand ol’ time doing it.
It was great.
Then they played Back in Black by AC/DC and my car was literally shaking.
That, also, was great.
See, in Barry Schwartz’s Ted Talk, aptly titled ‘The Paradox of Choice’, he says this:
“The secret to happiness is low expectations.”
And this is where forced scarcity shines.
Forced scarcity is so powerful because by reducing the abundance of choice, you’re automatically lowering your exceptions.
You won’t find anything good on AM radio.
You won’t enjoy your afternoon walk without headphones on.
You won’t enjoy watching Netflix if you force yourself to pick something within 20 seconds.
That’s what we tell ourselves.
And if we’re right, and we don’t find enjoyment without those things, then we’ve met our expectations — aren’t we clever?
But there’s another benefit…
If our expectations are low, then the only way to go is up… right?
From my experience, the brain adapts to scarcity rather quickly.
When you’re moving through your day with low expectations (with scarcity, and a lack of highly stimulating options) you’re giving your brain the chance to be satisfied with less.
If you go to the toilet without your phone and sit there for 10 minutes, you’re probably going to start reading the back of the bottle of toilet cleaner.
Hell I’ve even memorised the Spanish part of the label on my CeraVe face wash in the shower.
Your brain adapts to its surroundings, even if they’re in Spanish.
The human brain loves being busy, but if given time and space it will allow itself to be busy with less and less stimulation.
I won’t go into dopamine in this article — but yes, dopamine plays a huge factor in this.
The reason the AM radio brought me enjoyment was because I didn’t expect it to, and I didn’t give myself any other option.
The only way to fight against the modern day paradox of choice is to embrace scarcity, boredom and imperfection.
Embracing this is an acknowledgement that things won’t always be how you want them, but that’s a necessary part of being human — even if your brain tells you it’s not.
